I know I haven't been my best lately, in fact I've sucked. You know everything, You've been witnessing everything... so like always, You seem to be the only one I can turn to. I don't know if this is a test you're putting me through or what...but I think Im reaching my absolute. Im not so sure I can carry on like this anymore. You're the All-Knowing...You know the best.
Taking someone's right to fulfil thier dreams is the worst I've done to anyone. Saying I was disturbed and I didn't mean to doesn't make it excuseable or me any less shameful than how much I am right now. So I guess what Im really asking is for You to please make this easier somehow ....not for me, I deserve to suffer but for the one who's goals and plans I've taken away. Make him stronger and guide him to his true potential.... and the right.
One last request, I don't know what Im supposed to do to make up...but if this is my punishment then I wish I never forgive myself for being the stupid retard I was. I can't believe I let my life, my jaan slip away just like that.........
Rabia.
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‘O Allaah, it is Your mercy that I hope for, so do not leave me in charge of my affairs even for a blink of an eye and rectify for me all of my affairs. None has the right to be worshipped except You.’
Ameen.
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