Here's a letter..

Hey you,

I never got the chance to tell you but hearing from you just before the new year made it all that better. Knowing I had you by my side, at that moment, was the only reason I believed in goodness. The only reason I was so convinced, 2012 was going to be great. I even said it to a few people y'know.."I can tell its going to be super!" with the widest grin a girl can pull off without looking stupid. I thought, it was finally the time to put all the worries aside and live in the moment. On a positive note. I was hopeful and you know how I feel about "hope" right?.. I never got the chance to tell you, it was all you ace. You are my rock..and I don't want it any other way.

Things have been a little..strange lately. Maybe it's just me and maybe it's the work load but I have..just..started to feel like..I am losing control. Like I can't manage anymore and that is freaking me out a little. Just a little. It would've been nice if I could just hear from you. I mean.. where'd you go? I don't like this. I miss you okay? ..If you were here, I would tell you what I think of everytime there's a Jazzy B song playing. Trust me, you'll be surprised. I would tell you how it felt to talk with you for the first time ever on the phone and how I wished you were closer. I would read out the many letters I wrote to you but never sent them. Letters..just reminiscing. I would also tell you what it feels like to be the centre of everyone's expectations - its a waste. But maybe you know that already, everybody gets to learn lessons like these in thier own way right?..... Jaan..I would tell you how having you, saves me..how you are my life. Because goodness knows, I am losing my mind right now. I am. I am a little tired. I hope you're good.

Just realised the last two letters I wrote to you, both ended in the same way :p.. -sighss- ..If I wrote poetry anymore, I would tell you.. all the things... but then you probably know already? ..And if there's a question, then you know I don't dodge or dismiss so I will answer..as honestly as I can..... For now, just know you're loved. Okay?

Only yours,

Rabia