I thought he was perfect and it made me more in awe of him because hey, who is perfect anymore? ..and there he was. He was everything I wanted and needed and he made me believe in soulmates because why else would we connect so much? ..Often times I would be thinking of him and he'd message or he'd say something that was on the tip of my tongue and I never told him because its uncanny. Not weird and spooky uncanny but more..stunning and magical. And that's out of this world, right? Two people from different sides of the world who've never known each other before don't connect like that, right? There's gotta be something special there, something that you can't put a finger on, to fall in love so hard, right? ....
And yet, here we are. He gave up on me. He said he would handle it all, that he had faith in our love. He backed out. He didn't handle it at all.
And the situation is so that one isn't even adept of hating him because one hasn't stopped missing him still...
I keep telling myself I don't deserve the hurt and I keep putting myself in the same position over and over and over again... I remember telling him I was scared having lost him one too many times.. I remember asking him never to leave me... He got slightly defensive "why does it seem like you think I'M gonna' leave you? I don't want to and never have thought to"...... smh. I wonder if he even misses me like I do.. why doesn't he ever call to hear my voice? .. meh..
2 states is on tv right now.... oh, the irony.
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